The Great and Dreadful days continue!!!

Dear Family and Friends:

Did you know that it is the "law" in China that if you are 16 and older and male that you have to smoke?! Also, it is the "law" that you have to clear your throat and spit frequently whether you are male or female. Not only do you have to spit- you have to do it with a lot of noise. And here you thought the only law was that you have to have rice with each meal! Other interesting laws- when you are driving you have to cut people off. Also, you have to drive on sidewalks if there is too much traffic on the roads. Cars have the right of way and the only bikes that are allowed in China are the ones made in the 30's, 40's or 50's. Also, the bike must be able to carry more than what you can put in a full size pick-up truck!

Another law- you have to be very, very poor and very humble and have a smile on your face. There truly are a lot of wonderful people here. However, as Dorothy said in the Wizard of OZ, "there's no place like home."

I just read Sheryl's blog and she truly is doing remarkably well. She really has made her own world- even though for the past several days she has been so weak that she can hardly even sit up in bed. She has not had the strength to talk on the phone - but her spirits are still up and we feel blessed that this miracle is taking place right in front of our eyes. I can't tell you the countless tender mercies that have been ours- the many, mighty miracles that have been ours - the mighty and many spiritual experiences that have been ours - but they have come with a heavy price, one that both of us would never trade. As we have said before we could not have done this without all of your prayers - fasting- temple attendance and wonderful service. Shi Shi, Shi Shi, Shi Shi. (Thank you 3 times)

Now with that said, I want to visit with each of you on a few things that this experience has taught me in a very real and difficult way. As most of you know, I am a pretty positive and cheerful person. I like to turn lemons into lemonade- with a little extra sugar. I have always loved life- and the many things that life has to offer. I love to take control of my world and make things happen- which means I have not always been the most patient person!! My father has taught me not to procrastinate but to be action oriented- so I truly love making things happen and being around the people that I love. My family has been everything to me. Sheryl has always been my whole life with the children running deep into my thoughts and wanting to be with them and see them in all that they do. For the past 40 days, as Sheryl has either been in the box or with so many tubes and pain that I have not been able to be with her, it is hard to look thru the glass and not be able to hug her. The phone doesn't work most of the time for Sheryl- so I can hear her but she cannot hear me. Many of you have offered to fly over and see Sheryl and me - we had to say no. I truly feel that I am alone and in prison. I have never felt so all alone as I do now. Yes, I feel the peace of the Lord, yes, I have the scriptures, yes, I have prayer-but I am alone and Sheryl is all alone. The people here at the hospital speak either no English or very broken. We speak no Chinese so it is hard to have a conversation. Last night I took Sheryl a sliced apple, some yogurt and a piece of bread. Her nurse microwaved it all for a long time! Of course, it was ruined! So I tried one more time and thru charades the nurse got it right the second time!

Although I desperately miss my children it is nothing compared to the way I have missed Sheryl. Seeing her- but not being able to hold her in my arms is difficult. I would love to walk hand in hand with her and just be able to sit down and talk with her as I put my arms around her. For all of you that have lost a spouse - I understand a little of what you have gone thru. We have been spending most of our days in the scriptures and they have been a life saver. Do we really understand how valuable the scriptures are in our lives or do we take them for granted? There are many examples when the people did not have the scriptures they were led quickly down forbidden paths.

We have spent a lot of time in the Pearl of Great Price and Old Testament but they still only go back 6000 years. That seems like a lot of time but Sheryl being in the box has given me hours of time to ponder - even many days about eternity. I have always heard - read -talked about forever but it never, ever hit me like it has being all alone. I started to think about all the years this earth has been around with Father Adam and each of the patriarchs of each dispensation. I started to ponder a million years- a billion- a trillion and started to ponder what it meant with the biggest number I could imagine. To be alone for eternity is the most empty - painful- ugly thought I could ever have. No wonder Alma and the sons of Mosiah changed their ways and went to preach for the remainder of their days because they had had a glimpse of the awful hell. It was so ugly to them that they could not imagine anyone going through it.

Whatever we are when we die- it never ends. NEVER! To be alone for anyone for whatever the reason will be the ugliest hell anyone of us could ever imagine. To not be part of the highest degree of the Celestial Kingdom is the never ending hell. To say I am happy alone - well, the Lord seems to honor our thoughts. I have said to Sheryl many times since we have been married that she would look beautiful even if she were bald. The Lord remembered! I have told her that I would be as happy as can be to be alone with her on a deserted Island. The Lord remembered! (That was the 1st month here.) Be careful of your thoughts- be careful of your words- because the Lord remembers and will test us.

I plead to all my family - my friends and anyone that will hear my voice or read my words- God is a merciful God but he wants a humble people. It's not about "show" to our friends and family. It's not about "show" to the world- he wants our hearts- our minds and our souls on His altar. He wants it now!!!!!!!!! I pray for all of us that we might make the days of our probation meaningful. Please have hope- have faith- and most of all have charity which never dies.

As the doctors in the states gave us no hope- just despair, I give all of you HOPE -MIRACLES- AND THE GOODNESS AND MERCY OF A GOD THE HEARS US AND LOVES US FOREVER!!!!!!!!!!!!

I testify that miracles do happen. You will in the near future be able to see with your eyes and touch with your hands my beautiful and wonderful eternal companion. You have watched our children be made strong- is that not a miracle that you can witness everyday? Is not that manna from the heavens? As parents who are missing our children so much we've known that our children have not missed a beat while in your care.

The people here in China, for the most part, have never even heard of Jesus Christ. Most of them have never even heard his name. 1.4 billion on the records! Most of these people have nothing. I mean nothing! Yet, I have seen so many of them who are so happy and loving. Teachable is what they are! How many of us are grateful for what we have in the gospel? I know that, as for me, too many of my waking hours have been spent in things pertaining only to this life instead of on the riches of the eternities.

For Sheryl and me - we will never be the same. Our hearts are so full of gratitude for all the kindness you have shown us and are so grateful for the Christlike service we have received from you.

I plead for you to have hope and faith and to know that we worship a God of Miracles, a God of mercy, and Endless is his name!

Forever and never ending for time and all eternity,

Your father, son, brother, uncle, and friend:

Lon A. Wardrop